I would like to believe that I am a gate person rather than a fence person, but I can see all the fences that I have created and it makes me sad. I love my fences, but I hate them as well. On one hand I like to think that I am accessible, and that there are no barriers that must be crossed in order to get to my heart. On the other hand, I want people to know that there are certain things that I like to identify myself by.
I would like to think that I am an accepting person, and then I experience someone that has a different interest, a different perspective, or a different personality and I don’t seem to be able to appreciate it as much as judge it. Why do I do this? Is appreciation a harder task than judgment?
Judgment comes easier to me because it requires no interaction. Judgment comes easier because it allows me to think myself superior to the other. I tend to construct a world in which I am king because of the separation between me and my subjects. I find that when I step into the kingdom of acceptance I am okay until I get hurt, and then I retreat to the other kingdom again.