So I came home early today and thought to myself, I should clean out my fire place in anticipation of my parents coming to visit. My parents and I have a fundamental disagreement on what constitutes “comfortable.” With Asher (ironic) by my side cleaning out the ash and soot I decided that most of it was gone so I could put down the shovel and clean the rest with the shop-vac. About 30 second’s went by before I noticed my ten year old, bottom of the line, shop-vac was spewing ash and soot all over my living room and dining room.
For those of you who think that I am talking about getting a little on the carpet, I wish that was the case. I could not see half of the room because of the black soot. By the time the ash had cleared my whole upstairs seemed to have a film on it, and much of the living room had what could only be described as a blanket. It was at this point that I went outside, cleaned the shop vac, made sure it was working properly, then went back to start to clean up. The shop-vac failed one more time. That is when the pastor in me left and I walked out of the house and chucked the shop-vac about 20 yards (I measured later after I cooled off).
After about 2 hours of cleaning I went downstairs to where I had sent my children while my wife and I tried to tackle a colossal mess. I explained to them that the mess upstairs was much more dire than they might realize and that I needed my boys (the three oldest) to keep and play with their little sister. While I was explaining this I had a caesar salad in my hand that was prepared before this whole thing began. When I was finished talking I asked them if they understood and my two year old daughter said “okay dad” as I had given her a role in this whole thing, and my 9 year old son said “can I finish your salad.”